Broken Body Searching For Healing, Happy Place

Nothing kills a slow, sexy descent down the stairs quite like the cracking of ankles, backs and other body parts. If I was Angelina Jolie, having to play the part of a screen siren slowly gliding down the stairs into the arms of my lover, I would officially be screwed. I’m 27 years old. And by old, I mean OLD. I’m not sure if it was the years of netball, waterpolo, skiing, touch football and every other imaginable sport on offer, or if it’s just my body, but I creak Happies. I creak like a derelict terrace on a stormy night and quite frankly, I’m over it.

The list of ailments varies, but for the past six months, my complaints have revolved around one very sore, creaky and painful left shoulder. I’ve tried everything from physio to acupuncture and yep, I’ve even subjected myself to a terrifyingly unhealthy dose of radiation in order to take a closer look at the injury. Not to mention the pain of having a cortisone injection stabbed into my raw tissue and the exorbitant cost of an ultrasound. All in all, it can be ascertained that I’d rather cut this limb off than have to deal with it any longer.

Or at least, that was the stage I was at when I met Glenn Walmsley. Glenn is a myotherapist – one of only a handful in the state – and can be credited for my drastic turnaround from battleaxe to screen siren in only a matter of sessions. As it turns out, the relentless pain caused by goodness knows what can, in fact, be fixed courtesy of Glenn’s insanely strong fingers and holistic view on the body.

After months of tests and not really being told what was wrong, Glenn wrapped this puppy up in only a few short minutes. Abut 60 to be exact. The problem was that as a writer, sitting at my desk for hours on end, working over two computer monitors and tapping away at the keyboard at NASCAR speeds, causes the muscles around my shoulders to tighten and tighten and tighten until they are pretty much wrapped around each other.

You see Happies, I hold all my tension in my neck and shoulders, and as I sit and type, my shoulders subconsciously start heading north, taking the scenic route up to my earlobes and hanging out up there. It’s not good for the old posture, as you can imagine, and as a result, all my muscles start swearing and fighting and hating each other, causing me all kinds of pain.

Which brings me, rather conveniently, back to Myotherapy and my mate Glenn. I’m going to allow him to explain what Myotherapy is all about, as he’s the man in charge…”Myotherapy is the systematic manipulation of soft tissue using acupressure and massage, working on the Meridian system to balance the C’hi (energy) of the body.” Well said Glenn, well said.

Here’s my take. Myotherapy takes massage to a whole new level, it’s a similar feeling with warm towels and body oil and vigorous rubbing, but far more intense, and while you lay on the bed coming to the realisation that your body is tighter than a pole dancer’s g-string, your body is slowly, and at times painfully being unravelled right before your eyes. One hour later, you emerge and new person, and a pain-free one at that.

Of course, over time the issue repeats itself as I still haven’t mastered the art of telling my shoulders to sit down and shut up. So, I see Glenn regularly to rectify the situation as I practice my series of stretches and strengthening movements to help heal this baby up. I’ve also just been through a fascinating functional assessment with Glenn, whereby he builds a program created just for your body and needs in order to align the physical body and mind into a happy place. But more on that later. For now, it’s all about muscle release and pain-free sleeps. Oh, and being able to glide down the stairs, sans creaks.

Tell me Happies…

Have you ever heard of Myotherapy?

Do you have a reoccurring injury or are living with pain?



  1. Glow Makeup Artistry · January 3, 2011

    That’s great Yaz. I’m glad you’ve found the right help finally. It can be so frustrating not getting any answers. I’ve been seeing a Myotherapist in Geelong for years now. He’s amazing. I only wish it wasn’t a 2 hr drive to get to him, but it’s always worth it. He helps my baby and toddler too. I took them when they were newborns to be treated after the long labour and it’s great if my toddler has a fall to get hum fixed straight away. Something for you to keep in mind for the future he he 😉

    • MM · January 3, 2011

      My body has felt out of sync since my last pregnancy I need this bad! And I’m near Geelong! Would love the details of your myotherapist GMA.

      • Glow Makeup Artistry · January 3, 2011

        Hey MM. His name is Andrew Oosterlaan
        9 Torquay Rd, BELMONT, VIC, 3216
        Phone: (03) 5245 7373

        Let me know how you go. I’m sure you’ll love him. He is fantastic!
        Nat xo

  2. Nikki Parkinson · January 3, 2011

    My back seized up yesterday after taking on a dumping wave in the surf. Ouch. I am in a lot of pain and it’s a public holiday but have managed through the power of Facebook to find a recommended therapist for tonight. (I also visit a chirpractor once a month for general wellbeing and that helps to iron me out on a regular basis). Would love to try Myotherapy now though – have same shoulder issues as you!

  3. Kim · January 5, 2011

    Your shoulder issue sounds exactly the same as mine Yaz. I too am a writer and work at a desk/two monitors all day causing my shoulders and body to slump and create all sorts of tension headaches, neck and shoulder pains. Though the help of an amazing Physio I was able to work on strengthening my upper body through a series of stretches and gym work-outs. I also discovered one leg was shorter than another, sounds freaky but I never realised! This caused my hips and back to go out of alignment. To sum up, it’s been 8 months of working on these areas to get to a point where I am much better and rarely suffer any pain. Sure it’s a work in progress, my posture is still not great but I’m getting there and I am certain you will too. I’ve never tried Myotherapy but after reading your post wouldn’t rule it out. Good luck!

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  5. crystaldance · January 15, 2011

    I’ve got the step on the ladder underneath the myo’s. They are amazing.
    I’m so glad you found someone you like Yaz! It’s really important to connect with your therapist so that you can heal!
    When I was first reading you post I thought “Ah! But that can be FIXED! It’s not all over!”… but then I kept reading and was delighted that you came to the same conclusion.

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  9. Sally Austin · March 31, 2015

    The blog was absolutely fantastic! There is Lot of great information which can be helpful in some or other way. Keep updating the blog, looking forward for more contents.

  10. Kai Freame · September 1, 2015

    Hi I’m Freame, I have a question. I’m looking for an answer for this for 1 hour now but I can’t find it the internet. I have a tear in the rubbery cushions of the knee joint. Can Myotherapy cure my joint problem?

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